Rush Limbaugh: Dishing teh stoopid

I had the unfortunate opportunity to hear Rush Limbaugh's show yesterday. Even worse, I read the transcript. See anything stricking:

By the way, it is this vast particle collider at the CERN research centre that
they say could replace the Internet, with speeds so fast that you'll be able to
download a high definition movie, a two-hour high definition movie in three
seconds. They're going to use a particle accelerator and collider for it.

NO! The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) outputs large datasets that data-transfer is burdened by current technologies. By utilizing essentially parallel computing technologies (interfacing both hardware and software) you can overcome the data-transfer problem. The 'Grid' is not equivalent to the LHC, though it was developed as an answer to the so-called large data problem.

In other words, he's looking for a "God particle." He's looking for a
particle to prove God. Dr. Higgs, please, just look out the window. You see that
tree? You see the grass? Whatever is outside your window, all of it, it's God
particles. Every aspect of it is God particles.

I liked Leon Lederman's book. It was a fun read. Limbaugh has ruined the book for me. Thank you idiotic commentator on current events for ruining science for me.

But in all seriousness, the Higg's boson, which would essentially explain the reason for the massless photon and heavy W and Z bosons, is an important fundamental particle of the Standard Model. I wouldn't have called it the "God particle" as Lederman playfully called in his book, but that's just a diversion from the more important aspect of its discovery: electroweak symmetry breaking.

But Limbaugh and other media sources have sipped from teh stoopid kool-aid. They lacked reading comprehension to see why Lederman called the Higgs boson the God particle. I'm too frustrated at the moment to expand any further. Teh stoopid hurts my brain too much.

These scientists, they fear God because God has the answers, God's smarter
than they are.

God's a civil engineer. Only a civil engineer would put a recreational area in a waste zone.

But seriously, the above quote is one of those "he didn't just say it, right?" *shrug* I don't fear God. His followers scare me enough as it is.

In fact, one of these guys in Ben Stein's movie, guy named Hawkins who's over at
Oxford I think, Oxford or Cambridge, Ben Stein goes over and interviews him in
this movie, Expelled.

Hawking is a theoretical physicist from Cambridge. Dawkins is an ethologist and evolutionary biologist from Oxford. Only Limbaugh would be capable of combining the names together in a horrific screed.

And the movie is the laughing stock of the blogosphere. Especially when PZ Myers was kicked-out of a screening despite him actually being in the film.

Ugh. The internet has exemplified teh stoopid which existed even before the internet was popular outside of physicists. Shame on the internet for promoting teh stoopid to higher levels. And shame on Limbaugh for being a participant in teh stoopid.

Offsetting "teh stoopid"

Human civilization has an impact on the local and global environment. Everytime we cook food or drive to the grocery store, we are creating waste products that are literally dumped into the local ecology to handle.

There are several thingss we can do that lessens or offsets our impact on our environments. The most obvious first step is to do a cost-benefit analysis of our activities and remove those activities which are deemed more wasteful than beneficial, such as showering three times a day or flushing twice after fecal expulsion. The next step is to invest our resources into developing new methods to accomplish the same goals that decrease our impact on the environment, such as researching for alternative fuel sources or cost-efficient, energy-efficient white-light sources.

Obviously there is a need to determine what resources we have for such endeavors. Not everyone has the necessary background to be actively involved in the research. However, we can be passively involved. Such endeavors require money, both for materials and to pay for the labor involved. [1] The best method for the average citizen would be to write your Congressman or Congresswoman and demand more funding for the National Science Foundation, the Department of Energy, and other government institutions that are the prime source of scientific funding.[2] You could also purchase carbon offsets to account for the necessary activities of your daily life that releases carbon emissions by offsetting such release via supporting energy resources that sequester such carbon instead.

Just like the environment, there are necessary evils involved in entertainment. Some of us are drawn to "teh stoopid" because we get some marginal enjoyment from observing "teh stoopid" in action. Our enjoyment has come to where it has become necessary for us sometimes to econimcally support "teh stoopid" on accident just to get our kicks. This is obviously bad for the total intelligence of human society. We need a way to offset our finacnical support of "teh stoopid".

One route is to write our Congress again. However, sometimes "teh stoopid" infects our politicians. It would be better to invest in lobby groups to simultaneously combat "teh stoopid" in politics and in general.

Thus, if you do an activity that somehow gives money to "teh stoopid", then I recommend offsetting your contribution by donating to an organization that opposes "teh stoopid". For example, if you purchase a book on creationism, purchase a book on evolution. If you purchase a conservative's screed (eg. Anne Coulter) purchase a more balanced analysis of the current event topic. If you bought materials from a company that denies global warming, invest more in lobbying groups that are pushing for anti-global warming legislation through Congress. If you watch YouTube or MySpace and click their ads, then listen to NPR or watch PBS and donate money to your local broadcasting station. [3]

"Teh stoopid", however entertaining it is, must not be allowed to gain an economic advantage from those of us who are purely entertained by its existence. Thus, we must donate and offset our contribution to "teh stoopid".

Do it. Nao! I demand it.



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[1] Graduate students need money to buy ramen, too!).
[2] And if you're rich, please donate to a research institute to create an endowed chair. That simultaneously creates a source of funding for research as well as recruits top-notch researchers to that institution. And, your name will be immortalized; so, that's always cool!
[3] YouTube, however funny internet phenomena is, needs to be offset by the introduction of news and current events. Tron man IS NOT a current event.

ACS convention

The national ACS meeting starts Sunday in New Orleans, LA. This means I will be boozing it up in New Orleans this weekend. Send me a facebook or a myspace or email my gmail (recspecz) if you'll be in town and want to booze, talk about chemistry/physics, bitch about being an undergraduate/graduate, or booze some more.

I'll be at the undergraduate poster session Monday from 2-4pm. Check out my poster (#944: "Application of a kink-based path integral formulation to molecular systems"). Unfortunately, it isn't an open bar environment so my science may be weakened by my socially-awkward, sober self.

Did I mention there will be booze in New Orleans?

Give her the Shock(er) Absorber

The burning question of why women wear sports bras has finally been answered for those of us who prefer to learn visually. This website will show you the awesome power athletic activity has on boobs.

Do FF+G on extreme activity level. It really looks like to me that the nipples would cut the girl's elbow in two. Maybe it's just me.

This is me right now

Yeah, my hair is in a very confirmationally irregular poisition as well and tends to stay that way all day.

Windooze Music to the max!

Pure badassery.

Step aside alpha, my boy pi is in the limelight

A not-so-recent ACS article came out mid this month about trapping a π-helix conformation fold in a specifcally synthesized polypeptide. I'm not a biochemist; in fact, I loathed the course with a passion [1]. But, I appreciate the interests in π-helixes, both theoretical and practical. So, I bring this topic to attention at the moment.

Okay, really I'm just amazed by the π-helix itself independent of the researchers' isolation of it. I mean, the thing has a one-angstrom hole in the middle! That's HUGE! It makes me want to use the thing to interfere matter waves with. Like, seriously.

Okay, that's enough ranting for now. Back to work, underlings! The boss is watching!


[1] Pre-meds ruin every course in college. This is why I move for them to have their own courses. That way, if/when I become a professor, I can avoid those courses like their mercaptans.

Influenza? Spam Email? What de Jevu!

You go to visit a graduate program and what do they give you in return? The flu.[1] Second time this semester, which translates into two different strands. Man, I love that thing called evolution. Buggard viruses get the best lot of biology: they do no metabolism yet reap the benefit of being able to multiply abundantly in their hosts.

So I've previously commented on some funny spam. Now for a not-so-funny spam. Unfortunately, some people may actually fall for it. It's a phishing attempt, and it's very easy to see why it's a phishing attempt.

Take a gander at the following communication from "services@irs.gov":

After the last annual calculations of your fiscal activity we have determined that you are eligible to receive a tax refund of $2839,49. Please submit the tax refund request and allow us 3-9 days in order to process it.

A refund can be delayed for a variety of reasons. For example submitting invalid records or applying after the deadline.

To access your tax refund, please click here [LINK REMOVED].

Best Regards,
Tax Refund Deparment
Internal Revenue Service

© Copyright 2008, Internal Revenue Service U.S.A. All rights reserved.

Okay, I know I haven't been doing taxes for very long, but when did I ever fill out a request form to get the money the government owed me? Never? That's what I thought.

But that wasn't the most blatant errors I noticed. How about who in the United States uses commas as the decimal notation? No one. That is common in non-English speaking countries. The decimal comma is common in Europe and Africa; not in America. So strike one.

Strike two: I know our governmental employees may not be the best at all times, but who would misspell department?

Just for lagniappe, I don't think the IRS can hold copyrights due to it being a government agency. Though I might be wrong here since the flu may be acting with my brain.

Now, if someone does have over $2K and wants to give it to me, leave me your name, number, and mother's maiden name in my email :-)

Bitch took my drink

I'm on the last leg of my graduate school visitations here in Boulder, CO, so-named "P.Chem Mecca". It's very nice here. Beautiful landscape, beautiful lasers, beautiful city, beautiful lasers, beautiful people, beautiful lasers. Did I mention lasers enough times?

I can see why ultrafast laser spectroscopy would be big in Boulder. The high is dry. That's key. Nothing is more annoying than to get moisture in your vacuum chamber and gunk up your signal.

There are good theorists here, too, and the ample number of spectroscopists keep the theorists dealing with quantum problems more so than statistical thermodynamics. I now have the tough decision between CU-Boulder, UIUC, and Johns Hopkins since each have their own unique strengths and weaknesses.

So, what's the weakness of Boulder and why the title of my post? Everyone knows the main reason to go on graduate school visits is booze yourself up with strangers and talk solid science while inebriated. That's no secret. And when the night is still young and the professors are all nestled in their beds with visions of psi-squareds and lasers dancing in their head, the graduate students take the visitors out to town on the department dime. That's no secret either.

What pissed me off last night was finding out that either Colorado or Boulder itself has a rule about licenses and age verification. Apparently, bars cannot accept licenses that are expired on the front but have a sticker on the back. It probably deals with the ease of creating fake IDs in this manner, but I call bullshit.

So i was at the bar last night, and the first server came by checking IDs and gave me a frosted glass. So I poured myself a beer from the pitcher and chatted about science with those near me. Maybe 15 minutes later, another server comes by to check IDs and give stamps out. She saw the expiration date, told me about the (idiotic) law, and bitch took my drink. She then proceeded to hover around the area the rest of the night to make sure I didn't sneak a drink.

So, needless to say, this was the first night of a visit that I was sober. YARG! Being sober sucks. Hopefully, maybe, I'll be able to make up with Bacchus today and enjoy the sweet lager that was denied to me last night by a less obnoxious server? We will see.

Think American Idol is bad?

How about Bulgarian Idol:


I think this proves without a doubt that people who can't sing but believe they can exist everywhere in the world. And sadly, this also proves that people enjoy listening to people who can't sing as a form of humor.

Now, I wish someone would humor me in fixing my Igor Pro algorithms and teach me the art of user interface. I'll bake you cookies?